Naperville dad, Tim Oyer, sent his family down a pit of despair last Sunday afternoon when he ran out of jokes at the dinner table. “We had just sat down for Easter dinner, and we’re all looking forward to the ham, the pie, and most importantly, Uncle Tim’s jokes,” said eyewitness Kelly Smith, niece to the victim. “Everyone comes over to hear them! When he didn’t crack any funnies, everyone kind of awkwardly sat there.”

When discussing his condition, Oyer inquired, “What is Beethoven’s favorite fruit?” He then promptly fell unconscious and was ushered away by nurses.

We send our condolences to his affected family. They are having a service in his honor on April 1, his favorite day of the year. This event will include a retelling of some of his favorite jokes, done by his close friends and family. It’s believed that these will be a few shared:

“I found out I was color blind the other day… It came right out of the purple.”

“What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye Matey.”

“You can’t run through a campsite. You can only ran, because it’s past tents.”

At this time, there is no cure for the loss of a father’s jokes. We can only hope this is an isolated incident.